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#1 |
![]() ![]() ![]() Drives: 04 Pontiac Grand Am, 08 Ninja 650r Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Bradenton/Ruskin FL
Posts: 1,165
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Billy Mays Facts
http://www.billymaysfacts.com/
1. When Billy Mays asks a clerk to break a $20 bill, he gets two $50s back. 2. Billy Mays fired The Donald. In pre-production. 3. Billy Mays made Simon Cowell cry tears of beauty. All he did was sing the opening line to his Awesome Auger pitch. 4. Billy Mays interrupted Bill O'Reilly. Then O'Reilly apologized for talking out of turn. 5. Chuck Norris once tried to roundhouse kick Billy Mays. Before his foot even left the ground, Chuck was already on his first of three easy payments of $29.95. 6. The GDP of Billy Mays is greater than the entire European Union. Before the recession. 7. The Chinese government has outlawed translating Billy Mays infomercials into Mandarin out of fear that the country's entire money supply would rush to the U.S. 8. The NFL pays Billy Mays for Super Bowl commercials. 9. In 2006, a man in Arkansas accidentally hit the bass boost button on his home theater remote during a Billy Mays infomercial. We only know this because last December, a team of forensic experts dressed in radiation-proof suits had finished their meticulous examination of the blast crater. 10. Narwhals wash their tusks with OxiClean. 11. Billy Mays attributes the power of his on-screen persona to an incident during his teenage years when he accidentally ingested a Caps Lock key from an IBM PS/2 keyboard. 12. Billy Mays talked Lindsay Lohan into playing for the other team. 13. A Nigerian scammer once emailed Billy Mays. He is now on his 400th package of Mighty Putty. 14. Chuck Norris and Billy Mays once had a beard-off. The winner was to get a bucket of OxiClean, and the loser's penalty was to perform in an ultra-neocon radio show. 15. Vin Diesel waxes his head with Liquid Diamond. 16. Billy Mays sold a lifetime of pity and a warehouse full of fools to Mr. T. 17. Mr. T once tried to throw Billy Mays. Instead of grabbing Billy, however, Mr. T found only a bucket of OxiClean in his hands. He immediately began cleaning his gold chains. 18. After hearing only two seconds of a Billy Mays infomercial, R. Lee Ermey reconsidered his own personal commitment to perpetually yelling. 19. Billy Mays was the chief component of President Obama's 2009 stimulus package until the Republicans demanded he be replaced with tax cuts for the stinking rich. Billy made out just as well. 20. If you act now... hahaha, just kidding! Only Billy Mays has the power to compel you to act now. |
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#2 |
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Drives: X-15 Velocipede Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SW Florida
Posts: 4,630
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Funny!
21. More TV remote control MUTE buttons are worn out by Billy Mays than any other cause.
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Go from the presence of a foolish man, when thou perceivest not in him the lips of knowledge
General Motors ASEP, A.S. Automotive Technology, Telecommunications Specialist, CISCO Network Engineer STANDARD DISCLAIMER camaro5 is furnishing this information "as is". camaro5 does not provide any warranty of the information whatsoever, whether express, implied, or statutory, including, but not limited to, any warranty of merchantability or fitness for a particular purpose or any warranty that the contents of the information will be error-free. |
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#3 |
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PWA Relapse
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What the... LOL!
- Xanthos
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2017 1LT/RS A8 Hyper Blue Metallic |
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#4 | |
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36.58625, -121.7568
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Quote:
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#5 |
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just can't seem to leave
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much better than the slapchop kid with the britney spears mic
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Eve ('00 FRC): hot-air intake
Rowan ('09 H3): 5spd mom-mobile Penny ('99 Sierra): 5.3 / HD 5spd... gone but not forgotten Samson ('18 HD): compounded 408 |
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#6 |
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Moderator.ca
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First Billy Mays fact sheet that I've seen.
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Note, if I've gotten any facts wrong in the above, just ignore any points I made with them
__________________ Originally Posted by FbodFather My sister's dentist's brother's cousin's housekeeper's dog-breeder's nephew sells coffee filters to the company that provides coffee to General Motors...... ........and HE WOULD KNOW!!!!__________________ Camaro Fest sub-forum |
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#7 |
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#8 | ||
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Truth Enforcer
Drives: anything I can get my hands on Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: anywhere and everywhere
Posts: 22,797
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lmao
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Never race anything you can't afford to light on fire and push off a cliff
A group as a whole tends to be smarter than the smartest person in that group until one jackass convinces everyone otherwise. Quote:
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#9 |
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Location: ...
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#10 |
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SoCal C5 Family Member
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Those Billy Mays commercials in spanish are just awful!!!!
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#11 |
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Wasn't sure this deserved its own thread so.....
Shamwow Showdown Billy calls Vince out on the radio: |
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#12 |
![]() ![]() ![]() Drives: 04 Pontiac Grand Am, 08 Ninja 650r Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Bradenton/Ruskin FL
Posts: 1,165
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Wow they are serious about that.
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