What would you do

ender2664 · 08-26-2016, 10:59 AM

I want to preface this with the fact that my brother in law is 40 and knows full well how much i love my car.

So i went to a family event at a church that had literally hundreds of parking spots only about a dozen of which were taken up, lots of parking spots up front. I parked my car way in the back where there were no cars and no reason for there to be any.
I showed up early and my brother in law showed up late mainly because i show up everywhere early and he shows up everywhere late.
Just to piss me off he parked his stupid 2016 Tahoe with 3 children under the age of 5 so close to my car...
I had to leave the event a little early and when i showed up to my car i saw he had parked so close i needed to get in from the passenger side of my car. After getting in and starting to leave i started wondering how he was able to get so close to my car and still get the kids out of their boosters and baby seats without hitting my car...he couldn't.
I got out to check the car and there was one ding mark a few hand prints and a butt marks on the car.

Normally i would sit someone down and have a rational discussion with the person that did this thing, but not this 40 year old. He does dumb stuff like this quite often and i knew whatever i said to him he would just brush off.

So my question to you is what would you have done if this was done to your car by someone in your family that you are not that big of a fan of? Not a hostile relationship, i just have zero respect for him.

sherob · 08-26-2016, 11:09 AM

Knowing he's an ass, and knowing he would probably do something like this... I would have either parked where or in a place he couldn't have parked next to me like that, or drove something else.

Now, since that was done... I would have probably done the same to his windshield... hand prints all over the drivers side making sure my hands were as sweaty as possible, perhaps... a ding for a ding would have crossed the line for me.

KJZ28 · 08-26-2016, 11:13 AM

You mentioned Church, so here is the biblical response and how I would approach it, "5 “If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over. 16 But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ 17 If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector." Matthew 18:15-17

But also remember this, Matthew 18:21 "Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?”22 Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times."

E-Ray · 08-26-2016, 11:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KJZ28

You mentioned Church, so here is the biblical response and how I would approach it, "5 “If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over. 16 But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ 17 If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector." Matthew 18:15-17

But also remember this, Matthew 18:21 "Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?”22 Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times."

So after 77 dings and scratches, you can kick his but.

ssrs2lt · 08-26-2016, 11:46 AM

Not much now except remind him of common courtesy

ender2664 · 08-26-2016, 11:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KJZ28

You mentioned Church, so here is the biblical response and how I would approach it, "5 “If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over. 16 But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ 17 If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector." Matthew 18:15-17

But also remember this, Matthew 18:21 "Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?”22 Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times."

I'm an anti-theist so...
Normally I'd never step foot in a church but my sister I love with all my heart was having her son baptized, so I went for her.

hrpiii · 08-26-2016, 11:49 AM

In this instance, and especially with kids, I would let it go and get it fixed. I may mention to him what it cost to get a ding removed, but if it's like $50, is it really worth putting a wall up between the families over something like this. Not like he shot your dog or burnt your house down, it's a freakin' ding on a car. Not the end of the world. I understand you are not happy about it, frustrated about it, pissed about it, but it can be fixed and fixed pretty cheaply.

Now if he had borrowed your car and wrapped it around a tree, yeah, then it's an issue.

Think long term, and family. Trust me, let it go, pick your battles and this is not a battle worth anything.

ender2664 · 08-26-2016, 11:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sherob

Knowing he's an ass, and knowing he would probably do something like this... I would have either parked where or in a place he couldn't have parked next to me like that, or drove something else.

Now, since that was done... I would have probably done the same to his windshield... hand prints all over the drivers side making sure my hands were as sweaty as possible, perhaps... a ding for a ding would have crossed the line for me.

He has never messed with my car, he just does stupid stuff. I didn't think he'd even dream of messing with my car.
this was a big parking lot and created significantly more work for him and his wife having to lug their kids all the way from the back of the lot.

ender2664 · 08-26-2016, 11:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hrpiii

Think long term, and family. Trust me, let it go, pick your battles and this is not a battle worth anything.

In my life DNA entitles u to no extra chances, in fact it entitles you to less. If a stranger or someone who didn't know how much I love my car did this, I'd give them a talking to and let it go. Knowing what my car means to me makes it that much worse in my eyes.

ender2664 · 08-26-2016, 11:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hrpiii

In this instance, and especially with kids, I would let it go and get it fixed.

Looking back I should have considered that.

I do not have kids, never will, and am not a fan so my silly mind didn't consider that although it should have.

Bulldog3071 · 08-26-2016, 11:59 AM

Sounds like the idiot brother in law, we all have one in the family you're not alone

ender2664 · 08-26-2016, 12:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bulldog3071

Sounds like the idiot brother in law, we all have one in the family you're not alone

Yeah, I have two ridiculous brothers in law but an awsome one and a decent sister in law...I guess it kind of cancels out :/

hrpiii · 08-26-2016, 12:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ender2664

In my life DNA entitles u to no extra chances, in fact it entitles you to less. If a stranger or someone who didn't know how much I love my car did this, I'd give them a talking to and let it go. Knowing what my car means to me makes it that much worse in my eyes.

I can understand that, I truly can. My sister and brother know what my car means to me, and if they done it, they would truly be sorry and offer to pay. But if they didn't, I wouldn't care (I wouldn't like) I would fix it and move on.

I can preach this because I have seen this similar situation with my wife and her eight older sisters. Then the children pick up on it and have no idea why the family hates each other.

No, DNA doesn't give a free pass, but you have to weigh the issues and what it means to you and the other family, and their children. It's a ding, not a dent that may/would require repairs and new paint. Just saying think about long term effects and how it could go bad quickly.

ender2664 · 08-26-2016, 12:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hrpiii

I can understand that, I truly can. My sister and brother know what my car means to me, and if they done it, they would truly be sorry and offer to pay. But if they didn't, I wouldn't care (I wouldn't like) I would fix it and move on.

I can preach this because I have seen this similar situation with my wife and her eight older sisters. Then the children pick up on it and have no idea why the family hates each other.

No, DNA doesn't give a free pass, but you have to weigh the issues and what it means to you and the other family, and their children. It's a ding, not a dent that may/would require repairs and new paint. Just saying think about long term effects and how it could go bad quickly.

A wise man u r

My car was a 5 year sobriety gift to myself congratulating myself for turning around my life and succeeding at something 99% of people fail at. I told myself at the beginning of the journey when I made 5 years I'd buy my dream car.
The fact he was in no way sorry is part of what made me overreact. Had my other sister done it and apologized it would have blown off my shoulders like it didn't even happen.

08-26-2016, 10:59 AM	#1
ender2664 Account Suspended Drives: 2016 2SS Join Date: Mar 2014 Location: Palm Desert Posts: 2,353	What would you do I want to preface this with the fact that my brother in law is 40 and knows full well how much i love my car. So i went to a family event at a church that had literally hundreds of parking spots only about a dozen of which were taken up, lots of parking spots up front. I parked my car way in the back where there were no cars and no reason for there to be any. I showed up early and my brother in law showed up late mainly because i show up everywhere early and he shows up everywhere late. Just to piss me off he parked his stupid 2016 Tahoe with 3 children under the age of 5 so close to my car... I had to leave the event a little early and when i showed up to my car i saw he had parked so close i needed to get in from the passenger side of my car. After getting in and starting to leave i started wondering how he was able to get so close to my car and still get the kids out of their boosters and baby seats without hitting my car...he couldn't. I got out to check the car and there was one ding mark a few hand prints and a butt marks on the car. Normally i would sit someone down and have a rational discussion with the person that did this thing, but not this 40 year old. He does dumb stuff like this quite often and i knew whatever i said to him he would just brush off. So my question to you is what would you have done if this was done to your car by someone in your family that you are not that big of a fan of? Not a hostile relationship, i just have zero respect for him.

08-26-2016, 11:09 AM	#2
sherob Drives: 2015 SW 1SS/RS 1LE Join Date: Mar 2015 Location: Brighton, CO Posts: 2,736	Knowing he's an ass, and knowing he would probably do something like this... I would have either parked where or in a place he couldn't have parked next to me like that, or drove something else. Now, since that was done... I would have probably done the same to his windshield... hand prints all over the drivers side making sure my hands were as sweaty as possible, perhaps... a ding for a ding would have crossed the line for me. __________________ “The Eagles and the Captain and Tennille ruled the airwaves, and we were the answer to it.” - Joey Ramone

08-26-2016, 11:46 AM	#5
ssrs2lt Drives: too many Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: oh va pa ma tx Posts: 3,046	Not much now except remind him of common courtesy __________________

08-26-2016, 11:59 AM	#11
Bulldog3071 Drives: 2010 Camaro 2SS/RS LS3 Join Date: Oct 2013 Location: Kernersville, NC Posts: 931 View My Garage	Sounds like the idiot brother in law, we all have one in the family you're not alone __________________ Hurst Short Throw Shifter, K&N CAI, SRP Racing Pedals, GM Performance Exhaust, GM GFX Package Lakewood Strut Tower Brace, JBA Shorty Headers, JBA 8 MM Wires, Airaid TB Spacer, Phastek CAI Scoop, Washer Bottle Relocation Kit, Stainlees Steel Brake Lines, Brake Performance Slotted and Drilled Rotors, BMR Tunnel Brace, BMR Trailing Arms, BMR Subframe Connectors, Borla ATAK Muffelers, Z28 Wickerbill Spoiler, VTC, Bow Tie Delete, BMR Adjustable Front Swaybar, BMR End Link Kit, BMR Extreme Rear Anti-Roll Kit, Diablo I1000 "InTune"

08-26-2016, 11:13 AM	#3
KJZ28 Drives: 2018 Buick Regal TourX Join Date: Aug 2015 Location: North of NYC Posts: 546 View My Garage	You mentioned Church, so here is the biblical response and how I would approach it, "5 “If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over. 16 But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ 17 If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector." Matthew 18:15-17 But also remember this, Matthew 18:21 "Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?”22 Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times."

08-26-2016, 11:49 AM	#7
hrpiii AKA "Beefcake" Drives: 2023 ZL1 Sharkskin Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Indy Posts: 8,529	In this instance, and especially with kids, I would let it go and get it fixed. I may mention to him what it cost to get a ding removed, but if it's like $50, is it really worth putting a wall up between the families over something like this. Not like he shot your dog or burnt your house down, it's a freakin' ding on a car. Not the end of the world. I understand you are not happy about it, frustrated about it, pissed about it, but it can be fixed and fixed pretty cheaply. Now if he had borrowed your car and wrapped it around a tree, yeah, then it's an issue. Think long term, and family. Trust me, let it go, pick your battles and this is not a battle worth anything.