Please Read!! Need your advice!! Why Relationships SUCK!!

[Mr Twisty]

Same story sounds totally different from the other side of the fence. Let's hear what she has to say.

[SScattergunSS]

Originally Posted by MisterCamaro69

Same story sounds totally different from the other side of the fence. Let's hear what she has to say.

Well, you make a very good point! BUT...since she's not part of our Camaro 5 family, and "5th GEN SS" is our brother...I think we ought to give him the benefit of the doubt.

[Emher]

Take it from someone who's learnt the very painful way, if you can't trust each other 100%, if she's keeping things from you, leave. I had some warning signals but ignored them since I was so in love, asked the girl to marry me, she said yes and then dumped me a month later. Later on it turned out that long before she'd accepted my proposal she'd secretly started seeing another guy and that she hadn't told me it was in effect over "since she didn't want to hurt me". Anyone want to guess how much that hurt me?

In any case, let this relationship go. It is not worth it,

[Haloman1346]

Sounds to me like both of you are very young and I love how you tell us what she lies about and yet you dont explain what you are doing behind her back.

Both of ya have some growing up to do if you are upset because she is making choices like going out with her friends B-day party WITH HER PARENTS and your at home chatting on a internet car forum.

If you want this relationship to work out my friend, you need to give her some space and let her be her and you do the same. Tell her "Look, you know how it makes me feel when you go out alone, but I trust you and I want you to go out and have a good time." Plant the seed that you dislike her going out but let her be herself.

You sound young and females come dime a dozen. If you are getting upset because you busted her smoking weed, I cant imagine you in 10 years in a real relationship when you find out she lied about paying the 950 dollar mortgage because she went out and bought a gucci purse, shoes and an outfit to match.....

You have 1 life bro, dont get to worked up at a young age over a girl. Throw her back and change baits, you may catch your trophy soon afterward.

[CatiaJockey]

I haven't seen anything in your postings to justify your lack of trust. So she smoked some weed, got drunk with friends.... you're both young and dumb right now. Enjoy your youth and learn from each other. Don't try to be her father, she doesn't want or need that. People lie to keep from facing the consequences of their actions. If she was afraid you'd scold her like a school girl I can understand the lying about it. Let your lover be herself and see if you love who she really is. And for gods sake don't mix up trust with jealousy. You don't have to like every aspect of a person to love them, but you must unconditionally accept them. If thats asking to much, maybe you're not ready.

[Mr Twisty]

Originally Posted by SScattergunSS

Well, you make a very good point! BUT...since she's not part of our Camaro 5 family, and "5th GEN SS" is our brother...I think we ought to give him the benefit of the doubt.

I can't do that Dave. (sorry had to) It's not fair to him to give advice just on his opinion. Did you know those close to you tend to know you better than you know yourself? In other words, I see myself as a kind gentle caring person, my wife don't see it

[SScattergunSS]

Originally Posted by MisterCamaro69

I can't do that Dave. (sorry had to) It's not fair to him to give advice just on his opinion. Did you know those close to you tend to know you better than you know yourself? In other words, I see myself as a kind gentle caring person, my wife don't see it

Ya know, acutally...I think you might be right.

[CynAgain]

Originally Posted by MisterCamaro69

I can't do that Dave. (sorry had to) It's not fair to him to give advice just on his opinion. Did you know those close to you tend to know you better than you know yourself? In other words, I see myself as a kind gentle caring person, my wife don't see it

Originally Posted by SScattergunSS

Ya know, acutally...I think you might be right.

There are always three sides to the story... his, hers, and the truth. Regardless, his perception of the situation is not good and that will effect his actions and reactions going forward. It's best to move on as painful as that might be right now.

[Zhawk]

My .02 (and take it for what it is worth)
Your going to have to decide if the issue is you trusting her, or you being jealous. Either way you are going to have to take a look at yourself and see if the way she is is something you want to live with.
There is no way to change someone. They have to change themself. You can create an environment that helps them but the reality of it is that they need to make the change. If you try to force it then you push them away or you get someone who will eventually resent you.
I know that sounds harsh. But, let's face facts, a loving relationship is hard even with mature, healthy adults. You start throwing in any kind of issues, especially trust or drugs/alcohol, and the relationship can go sideways real quick.

Whatever comes if this, I hope you only the best. Please, be mature about all of this. If you can't stay in a relationship like you are in, be a man and own up to it. Don't just blame her, if you do, you might just wind up here again. Good luck.