PWA "The Lounge" - Page 4615

ljustin293 · 09-18-2009, 11:35 AM

why Parents Drink

A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an
Envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to 'Dad.'

With the worst premonition he opened the envelope

with trembling hands and read the letter.

Dear Dad:

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.

I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice.

But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am. But it' s not only the passion...Dad she's pregnant.

Stacy said that we will be very happy.

She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.

Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone.
We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy.

In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so

Stacy can get better. She deserves it.

Don't worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself.

Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can

get to know your grandchildren.

Love, Your Son John

PS. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house.

I Just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the Report card That's in my center desk drawer.

I love you.

Call me when it's safe to come home.

Zeus · 09-18-2009, 11:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ljustin293

why Parents Drink

A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an
Envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to 'Dad.'

With the worst premonition he opened the envelope

with trembling hands and read the letter.

Dear Dad:

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.

I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice.

But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am. But it' s not only the passion...Dad she's pregnant.

Stacy said that we will be very happy.

She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.

Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone.
We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy.

In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so

Stacy can get better. She deserves it.

Don't worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself.

Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can

get to know your grandchildren.

Love, Your Son John

PS. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house.

I Just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the Report card That's in my center desk drawer.

I love you.

Call me when it's safe to come home.

LMAO!!!!!!!

Where was this a few years ago....

brandotron · 09-18-2009, 11:41 AM

A man is in court being tried for murder. The judge says to the defendant, "You're on trial here for beating your wife to death with a hammer." At that point another man stands up in the back of the courtroom and yells, "That bastard!"

The judge ignores the outburst and says to the defendant, "You are also standing trial for killing your wife's parents with a hammer." Again from the back of the courtroom, the same man stands up and yells, "That total rotten bastard!"

"Excuse me," says the judge, "I know emotions are running high in this case, but we have to maintain order."

"I'm sorry, Your Honor!" says the man in the back of the court. "It's just that I lived next to this guy for ten years, and every time I asked him if I could borrow a hammer, he said he didn't have one!"

ljustin293 · 09-18-2009, 11:41 AM

headed back to work

Zabo · 09-18-2009, 12:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NativeTexan

Subject: FW: "A Texas Wife"

Three men married wives from different states.

The first man married a woman from Michigan . He told her that she was to do the dishes and house cleaning. It took a couple of days, but on the third day, he came home to see a clean house and dishes washed and put away.

The second man married a woman from Missouri . He gave his wife orders that
she was to do all the cleaning, dishes and the cooking. The first day he didn't see any results, but the next day he saw it was better. By the third day, he saw his house was clean, the dishes were done and there was a huge dinner on the table.

The third man married a girl from TEXAS . He ordered her to keep the house cleaned, dishes washed, lawn mowed, laundry washed, and hot meals on the table for every meal. He said the first day he didn't see anything, the second day he didn't see anything but by the third day, some of the swelling had gone down and he could see a little out of his left eye, and his arm was healed enough that he could fix himself a sandwich and load the dishwasher.

brandotron · 09-18-2009, 12:11 PM

"Some girls are liars. I met this girl who had a dog, and I said 'Does he bite?' She said, 'No.' 'Really? Then how does he eat?' Liar." -Demetri Martin

Zabo · 09-18-2009, 12:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by brandotron

"Some girls are liars. I met this girl who had a dog, and I said 'Does he bite?' She said, 'No.' 'Really? Then how does he eat?' Liar." -Demetri Martin

But he's oh so funny.

FenwickHockey65 · 09-18-2009, 12:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NativeTexan

Morning, guys.

While getting into my car this morning, I noticed that my daughter decided to write on my dirty, wet car with her finger. She made squiggley lines on my rally stripes on the deck lid. So I wrote, "I am a dumbass" on her tailgate.

Tonight, I will let her know if she writes on my car again, I will break her finger.

Zabo · 09-18-2009, 12:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FenwickHockey65

Hows the 'Aw Puppy/vet' bidness goin'?

Or did you move onto campus already?

PQ · 09-18-2009, 12:33 PM

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, why the long face?"

BECAUSE I'M A HORSE!!!!!!!!!!!!

Zabo · 09-18-2009, 12:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PQ

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, why the long face?"

BECAUSE I'M A HORSE!!!!!!!!!!!!

Zabo · 09-18-2009, 12:59 PM

Ooo, just scored a bunch of Inglorious Basterds wallpapers. Win.

PQ · 09-18-2009, 01:02 PM

When I dropped my car off yesterday at the dealership to get it serviced, they asked me if I wanted my tires rotated.

pinkcamaro10 · 09-18-2009, 01:08 PM

LOL

yeah.. im bored....

09-18-2009, 11:41 AM	#64599
brandotron I am the internets. Drives: dangerously Join Date: May 2009 Location: Redondo Beach, CA Posts: 12,571 View My Garage	A man is in court being tried for murder. The judge says to the defendant, "You're on trial here for beating your wife to death with a hammer." At that point another man stands up in the back of the courtroom and yells, "That bastard!" The judge ignores the outburst and says to the defendant, "You are also standing trial for killing your wife's parents with a hammer." Again from the back of the courtroom, the same man stands up and yells, "That total rotten bastard!" "Excuse me," says the judge, "I know emotions are running high in this case, but we have to maintain order." "I'm sorry, Your Honor!" says the man in the back of the court. "It's just that I lived next to this guy for ten years, and every time I asked him if I could borrow a hammer, he said he didn't have one!" __________________

09-18-2009, 12:11 PM	#64602
brandotron I am the internets. Drives: dangerously Join Date: May 2009 Location: Redondo Beach, CA Posts: 12,571 View My Garage	"Some girls are liars. I met this girl who had a dog, and I said 'Does he bite?' She said, 'No.' 'Really? Then how does he eat?' Liar." -Demetri Martin __________________

09-18-2009, 12:33 PM	#64606
PQ Booooosted. Drives: 2010 Supercharged SS Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Mobile, AL Posts: 36,717 View My Garage	A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, why the long face?" BECAUSE I'M A HORSE!!!!!!!!!!!! __________________

09-18-2009, 01:02 PM	#64609
PQ Booooosted. Drives: 2010 Supercharged SS Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Mobile, AL Posts: 36,717 View My Garage	When I dropped my car off yesterday at the dealership to get it serviced, they asked me if I wanted my tires rotated. __________________

09-18-2009, 01:08 PM	#64610
pinkcamaro10 2G1FC1EV1A9110079 Drives: 2010 2LT/RS, 2013 2SS/RS 1LE Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: Arizona Posts: 4,752 View My Garage	LOL yeah.. im bored.... __________________

09-18-2009, 11:35 AM	#64597
ljustin293 Drives: 2010 VR CAMARO 2SS/RS Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: GA Posts: 15,060 View My Garage	why Parents Drink A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an Envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to 'Dad.' With the worst premonition he opened the envelope with trembling hands and read the letter. Dear Dad: It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you. I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice. But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am. But it' s not only the passion...Dad she's pregnant. Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children. Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy. In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better. She deserves it. Don't worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know your grandchildren. Love, Your Son John PS. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house. I Just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the Report card That's in my center desk drawer. I love you. Call me when it's safe to come home.

09-18-2009, 11:41 AM	#64600
ljustin293 Drives: 2010 VR CAMARO 2SS/RS Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: GA Posts: 15,060 View My Garage	headed back to work

09-18-2009, 12:59 PM	#64608
Zabo Gunning for Sixth Drives: '03 ZR2 Blazer Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Woodhaven, Michigan Posts: 9,358 View My Garage	Ooo, just scored a bunch of Inglorious Basterds wallpapers. Win.

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