Craig's List Personal Ad

WadeWilson · 04-08-2010, 04:07 PM

AN ACTUAL CRAIG'S LIST PERSONALS AD
㤤
To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before last.
Date: 2009-05-27, 1:43 a.m. E.S.T.
I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend, threatening our lives. You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings. I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message.

First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment; I didn't expect you to actually crap in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason. My girlfriend had just bought me that Kimber Model 1911 .45 ACP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening. Obviously you agree that it is a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head .... isn't it?!

I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come from with that brown sludge in your pants. I'm sure it was even worse walking bare-footed since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. [That prevented you from calling or running to your buddies to come help mug us again].

After I called your mother or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, I explained the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I went and filled up my gas tank as well as those of four other people in the gas station, -- on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 150 gallons and was extremely grateful!

I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go's, along with all the cash in your wallet. [That made his day!]
I then threw your wallet into the big pink "pimp mobile" that was parked at the curb .... after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver's side of the car..

Later, I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell phone. Ma Bell just now shut down the line, although I only used the phone for a little over a day now, so what 's going on with that? Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target.
The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess while he traced your number etc.).

In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you ... but I feel this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider, the career path you've chosen to pursue in life. Remember, next time you might not be so lucky.Have a good day!

Thoughtfully yours,
Alex

P.S. Remember this motto ... An armed society makes for a more civil society!

Xanthos · 04-08-2010, 04:11 PM

LMFAO.
- X

Da Hose · 04-08-2010, 04:12 PM

Warhead · 04-08-2010, 04:30 PM

If this truely did happen it would have been less of an effort to shoot the scum bag than type that out.

If you have a CCW and pull it, use it. In this case it was justified as the perp pulled a knife on you and gf, your life was in danger. If this is true the person with the weapon just commited armed robber by using said scum bags CC and cell phone.

If it is just a made up story, pretty funny.

AnnaBear@SpartaChevy · 04-08-2010, 04:34 PM

nice!

franknbeans · 04-08-2010, 04:39 PM

i got this email forwarded to me about 4 months ago. . .very funny, but most likely not true.

fielderLS3 · 04-08-2010, 04:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Warhead

If this truely did happen it would have been less of an effort to shoot the scum bag than type that out.

If you have a CCW and pull it, use it. In this case it was justified as the perp pulled a knife on you and gf, your life was in danger. If this is true the person with the weapon just commited armed robber by using said scum bags CC and cell phone.

If it is just a made up story, pretty funny.

Maybe more effort, but much more fun.

Great story (if it is true). I'm printing out a hard copy.

*Camaro_Corvette* · 04-08-2010, 04:48 PM

LOL

Vladi · 04-08-2010, 04:48 PM

really nice

Brokinarrow · 04-08-2010, 04:48 PM

I've read this somewhere before, pretty good though!

DaveT · 04-08-2010, 06:25 PM

Nice!!!!

bluch · 04-08-2010, 06:32 PM

camarowa · 04-08-2010, 07:00 PM

tlnewell0426 · 04-09-2010, 03:08 PM

Love it

04-08-2010, 04:07 PM	#1
WadeWilson How U Doin? Drives: 2014 CTS-V Coupe Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Californication Posts: 24,154 View My Garage	Craig's List Personal Ad AN ACTUAL CRAIG'S LIST PERSONALS AD 㤤 To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before last. Date: 2009-05-27, 1:43 a.m. E.S.T. I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend, threatening our lives. You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings. I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message. First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment; I didn't expect you to actually crap in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason. My girlfriend had just bought me that Kimber Model 1911 .45 ACP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening. Obviously you agree that it is a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head .... isn't it?! I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come from with that brown sludge in your pants. I'm sure it was even worse walking bare-footed since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. [That prevented you from calling or running to your buddies to come help mug us again]. After I called your mother or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, I explained the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I went and filled up my gas tank as well as those of four other people in the gas station, -- on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 150 gallons and was extremely grateful! I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go's, along with all the cash in your wallet. [That made his day!] I then threw your wallet into the big pink "pimp mobile" that was parked at the curb .... after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver's side of the car.. Later, I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell phone. Ma Bell just now shut down the line, although I only used the phone for a little over a day now, so what 's going on with that? Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target. The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess while he traced your number etc.). In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you ... but I feel this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider, the career path you've chosen to pursue in life. Remember, next time you might not be so lucky.Have a good day! Thoughtfully yours, Alex P.S. Remember this motto ... An armed society makes for a more civil society!

04-08-2010, 04:11 PM	#2
Xanthos PWA Relapse Drives: Formerly-Stick Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Oklahoma Posts: 12,588 View My Garage	LMFAO. - X __________________ 2017 1LT/RS A8 Hyper Blue Metallic

04-08-2010, 04:39 PM	#6
franknbeans Whipped Drives: 2010 CAMARO Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Pittsburgh-ish - PA Posts: 4,216 View My Garage	i got this email forwarded to me about 4 months ago. . .very funny, but most likely not true. __________________ Car of the week 7/7/14

04-08-2010, 04:48 PM	#8
Camaro_Corvette 36.58625, -121.7568 Drives: Team 1LE Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Earth Posts: 23,710 View My Garage	LOL __________________ I am seriously never serious vv V vv Next order of business

04-08-2010, 04:48 PM	#9
Vladi Russian maFFia Drives: 09-SLK350 Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Walnut Creek.CA, Turku Finland , St-Petersburg Russia Posts: 480 View My Garage	really nice __________________ http://www.youtube.com/user/SSVladi

04-08-2010, 04:12 PM	#3
Da Hose ACCOUNT HOZED BY GN...... Drives: 2011 SGM 2SS/RS #26731 Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Katy, TX Posts: 5,891 View My Garage

04-08-2010, 04:30 PM	#4
Warhead Drives: 2010 Black 2SS/RS Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Syracuse, Utah Posts: 268	If this truely did happen it would have been less of an effort to shoot the scum bag than type that out. If you have a CCW and pull it, use it. In this case it was justified as the perp pulled a knife on you and gf, your life was in danger. If this is true the person with the weapon just commited armed robber by using said scum bags CC and cell phone. If it is just a made up story, pretty funny.

04-08-2010, 04:34 PM	#5
AnnaBear@SpartaChevy Drives: 2011 Camaro 1SS Manual Synergy Grn Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Sparta Chevrolet, Sparta, MI Posts: 2,107	nice!

04-08-2010, 04:48 PM	#10
Brokinarrow Drives: 2012 Honda NC700x Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Indianola, IA Posts: 5,317 View My Garage	I've read this somewhere before, pretty good though! __________________

04-08-2010, 06:25 PM	#11
DaveT Drives: 2010 2SS CGM LS3 Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: SF Bay Area Posts: 236	Nice!!!!

04-08-2010, 06:32 PM	#12
bluch OH CANADA! Drives: 2011 RAM 1500 LARAMIE Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Edmonton, AB, CAN Posts: 3,930 View My Garage	__________________ Had to trade in the Camaro for a truck :(, but hopefully I can join the Camaro family again one day

04-08-2010, 07:00 PM	#13
camarowa Drives: 2013 SVT Raptor, sold 2010 Camaro Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: PNW....almost canada Posts: 1,907	__________________ - Pfadt Suspension Package; Springs & Sways - Brembo Brake Upgrade (Yellow); Courtesy Fesler Built - Custom Magnaflow Exhaust - Blacked-Out Bowties & RS Emblems, Front bowtie delete - Full Dynamat Extreme Trunk Coverage - Tinted side markers - Interior DSV Customs Leather Upgrades - Airaid CAI V2 - Forgestar F14 Gunmetal 20x9, 20x11 - Doug Thorley Shorties

04-09-2010, 03:08 PM	#14
tlnewell0426 Drives: 1SS ABM Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Virginia Beach Posts: 186	Love it

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