Private, not public... yuuuuuuge difference! When you agreed to abide by "their" rules when you signed up... you acknowledged you would abide by those rules.
I was a Moderator for a Honda motorcycle forum, and this forum is pretty aggressive compared to it... I am also a member of a Kawasaki motorcycle forum, and this forum is mild compared to it.
You play by the rules of the forum you're on... plain and simple. Just like going to a restaurant... don't like the food being served, don't go there.