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My pistol is an H&K 45. It's a great gun, so is the Sig, Glock, Kimber, etc.
If you don't have experience with firearms, a double action revolver may be a good choice.
But really, I don't think anything tops a shotgun. Get a 20 gauge for your wife (really even a 410 works for home defense). A Mossberg Cruiser or equivalent is such a solid reliable weapon with awesome stopping power and low overpenetration as long as you stay away from slugs/sabots.
(listen to GTAHVIT btw- you'd be amazed at the miss rate. Even trained people miss alot in panic situations)
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