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Thanks. So I looked at my uncle's van today, as he has the exact same system I do, and he set his up pretty much like that and said it was really easy. So I went out and attempted to install it, and realized there is not one area in my car that is a good place to mount it. Either it will be in the way of the controls, be launched by the airbag into my passenger's chest at 200mph in the case of a crash, or will not allow for good wire placement. Even if it could fit anywhere, the bracket will not adhere to any surface. Sigh. The dark side of Christmas rears its ugly head.
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