[Dave Coyle]

Originally Posted by Stingr69

He's 12 - you don't spank a 12 yr old.

They don't listen much at this point. The school did not find it so they can't do anything and it would have NO EFFECT on him at all if they did find it and deal out the punnishment. It only hurts the parents.

That said, here we go - I would advise you need to take a double dose of self control and talk with him calmly at the table. Explain the issue and stress the consequences if this happens again. Tell him about how you will feel if he does this again and how it will put a burden on all of you because of his disrespect for the rules. You need to get your point across to him that this is not acceptable and that he is responsible for his actions. Either he cares about you, or he does not. If he gets the message then fine. If he does not get the message, then you will have to let this all play out.

He either gets it now or he gets it later.

Be strong!

-Mark.

I agree with this person, at 12, he is too old to spank!!! It will only make him "withdraw" from you more!!! You need to set down and CALMLY talk to him, no one should be aloud to yell. One thing that I missed was "why did he take the knife to school in the first place!!" That question would scare me more than just knowing that he did take it to school. My son was 13 when he took a pocket knife to school and he did get caught with it and was suspended for 3 days to which he cleaned the yard up (spring cleaning) did dishes, laundry, anything we could think of for those 3 days. He just forgot to take it out of his pocket before going to school and really had no intention of using it on anyone!!! He learned a good lesson. I am no "pro" with kids and the troubles they hold inside but I do know that children from split up homes do tend to "act out" in different ways to get attention with hope that the parents will actually see what is really bothering them. Please for his sake, talk to him and REALLY LET HIM TALK AND YOU LISTEN to what he is saying.
Good luck to you and don't give up on him, he will get past what ever is bugging him with your LOVE and UNDERSTANDING.