Quote:
Originally Posted by bozbot
well the line you quoted from was actaully in response to someone else saying how they had a hot girl that was worth it, so this response i gave was a play on that. she is a very good looking woman.
however your question sounds a little deeper as in why is all of what is going on worth it, if that is the question. I will tell you.
when her and I first started dating, everything was amazing. we got along great, we had so much fun together doing even the simplest of things like a puzzle. we have alot of the same interests and goals. she makes me smile and i made her smile.everything was clicking perfectly. that is why we rushed into things. i was her superman and she was my lois lane.
This is very common in the beginning of a relationship.
that being said all of a sudden a couple weeks ago her attitude towards me changed. she would complain about every little thing that i either put in the wrong spot and the apartment, she complained that i was inconsiderate because I made so much noise when i woke up to go to work in the morning (she works at night so our schedules are off and she sleeps in). she would push me away if i tried to hug or kiss her.
at first I thought maybe some of it was linked to the fact that she was depressed because we had to put her cat (that she had for 20 years) down recently. so I didnt want to push things while she was coping.
then it kept getting worse instead of better so I started to defend myself against the attacks because I knew something was wrong. I would ask her calmly but she would just throw more stuff in my face. some things pretty hurtful too.
You backed off because that's what guys want ~ girls need to have a safe place to vent their feelings, sort stuff out. She's not comfortable for what ever reason to share those feelings with you.
Then... Instead of telling her she was hurting your feelings ~ you protected yourself. Now you're just fighting fire with fire.
Having a good relationship requires vulnerability. Its very difficult to do especially when she crawling up your a$$.
the woman that I first met and fell in love with is worth it but it feels like her feelings for me have changed and she doesnt want to be with me.
Trust your gut.
it all is keeping me very confused because I have been asking her flat out if she doesnt want to be with me and to just tell me, but she didnt. until last night...I went to her place to try and talk things out but it ended with her telling me she didnt want to be with me. so i drove home thinking it was over and then she started texting and emailing me right away. so we talked all night on chat and things were going well. now today again she is getting nasty with me again. i cant figure it out...
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I don't think she is mature enough to understand her own feelings much less be straight with you. I mean how can she possibly tell you what she feels when she doesn't even know.
You know you want to be with her. Tell her, then leave it at that. Tell her when she has things figured out she can call you, but don't allow her to take you on the roller coaster anymore. Its so easy to fall into it again because you want what you had before.
She told you she doesn't want to be with you. That hurt your feelings, she knew it, then she had some regret, and texts you on the way home. You two talk until things seem ok and the next day she's nasty again?
First of all, nasty is never acceptable. If nasty is the accurate term then something is inherently wrong with the relationship.
Second, its my opinion she was just smoothing things over because she felt bad for hurting your feelings. She meant what she said. Walk away.
Sorry, just my opinion based on your side of the story.
It sounds like you're putting a lot of thought into this and it commendable. Try to relax with some friends. You don't have to explain anything to them if you don't want to, they will understand.
I wish you the best of luck with everything.