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I think the best thing is for you and his mother to tackle the problem together. Even if you aren't on speaking terms, you should be able to reason with her. Sit him down and lay down some reasonable ground rules along with your ex; tell him that if he earns your trust you'll give him more freedom as time passes. Make it clear that if he breaks your trust he'll never get it back.
If he decides not to listen, take away his privileges - don't take him out, don't give him money, don't even give him rides to friends' houses. Like Abygale said, the only responsibilities you have are giving him food and shelter. Anything else is extra.
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